Oh my... You came back. Uh.... Well... NEXT time, I promise to have some new posters worthy of a visit. This time, by special request, I'm...continuing with the crap "lot" posters I got recently. I know...I know... I promised we were done with them. I had NO INTENTION of posting more. However...
In addition to my blog, I place my new poster postings in a variety of places. One of those places is the Classic Horror Film Board. The forum has a movie poster page (of course). It was there that I had this request:
"MAGG, don't worry about posting what you think are garbage posters. One man's trash is another's treasure. Post away and let us be the judges."
Sooooooo.... Here are 10 more "lot" posters--some of the worst (in my opinion) of the batch (and I still had PLENTY to choose from). Take a look or run screaming now. The choice is yours.
You are still here. Why? Did someone dare you? There's NO REASON to stick around. However, if you want to me to say "I told you so" when we get done, feel free to watch this mondo beyond dull edition of the Shock-O-Rama Poster Show unfold. On your marks, get set, SNOOOZE....
LA PASSANTE:
Zzzzz. Oh my stars. Just looking at this poster and knowing I have nine more stinkers to get through leaves me feeling like I can't possibly get through this. Ugh...It is taking all of my strength to even contemplate this turd o' a poster. Yellow? Really? Yellow (and orange and pink) has always just seemed like such an awful color for a poster. The FRIDAY THE 13TH knock off DON'T GO IN THE WOODS has a decent image...but it is stuck on a yellow background which nearly ruins it. Blah! I've heard of Romy Schneider but I don't think I've ever seen her in anything. This is soooo NOT a Monster A GoGo-type poster. A hard PASS on LA PASSANTE.
CHILDREN OF RAGE:
Is this a "review style" or is this the only one sheet this flick had? I've never seen/heard of the movie. It may be a fine film, but for it's sake, I'm hoping this is just the "review style" and it had a nicer poster...because this one is flat out B-O-R-I-N-G!
IT HAPPENED IN BROAD DAYLIGHT:
Another flick I've never heard of...but just look at that utterly forgettable artwork. It's instantly forgettable. Despite the rave reviews, no matter how much the verbiage might pique my interest, I'd have forgotten the title and everything about this film as soon as I walked away from the poster.
WATCH YOUR STERN:
I get the innuendo...but lame poster. This would proudly be displayed NO WHERE. And, hello? It's orange. Drew Struzan should just quit now. How can his work compare with these, uh...doodles? You may "laugh your stern off", but this movie came right out of the poop deck...and needs to be flushed away ASAP. What crap!
THE 5TH DAY OF PEACE:
Richard Johnson and Franco Nero are in this flick (whatever it is)--that is a plus. However, even though this poster boasts that the film is "one of the most bizarre episodes in the annals of military justice", this poster is a fine example of one of the most blah-zarre posters in the annals of movies. Lame.
MARCH OF THE SPRING HARE:
Good lord. Even the poster art guy is bored out of his mind and has fallen asleep.
TRIBUTE:
I actually saw this film when it came out---but not because of this weak poster. Jack Lemmon seems almost embarrassed to be seen on it. He's hunching his shoulders and trying to bury his face. I'm surprised some of those raised hands below him (applauding?) are not raising the finger. UGH.
THE GRASSHOPPER:
I know what you are thinking... How could I dislike a poster with Jacqueline Bisset in the shower? It's not like you can see anything. (And, look at it closely. It took me a moment or two to figure out what that man part was. An arm? How is it twisting behind him??? No...that's his bowed back. Duh!) And what else is wrong with it? It's yellow. Blah! Although it looks like it might be a bit on the sexy side (Hubba Hubba), it's produced by Garry Marshall and directed by Jerry Paris...which sounds like it should be a comedy. Whatever. I'm sure Joseph Cotton was thankful for the work.
MY FATHER'S MISTRESS:
Yes, she is attractive. Yes, it apparently is Scandinavian (Look at the cast list...full of names like Ulla, Bjorn, and Sjostorm). Although there is no rating shown, it may be trying to compete with I AM CURIOUS (YELLOW)...but as a poster this is more I HAVE DIARRHEA (PEPTO BISMOL PINK).
I MARRIED A SHADOW:
This is the best movie in the whole history of movies in the whole wide world...but you'd never know it based on this ultra-bad, instant coma-inducing poster. UGH! How could a studio go with this concept? Yes--ooooo---we see the o' so clever (yawn) silhouette of said shadow...but UGLY!!!! Who wants this crap hanging in their house...or theater? This must have been a big hit. NOT! (And I was kidding about it being the best movie ever. I'd never heard of it. Who had? NO ONE.) I hope the artist didn't give up his day job after getting the commission for this...
We are now done and...
I TOLD YOU SO!!!!
I wasn't kidding. Bad-Bad-BAD!!!
I have enough "lot" posters left for 4 or 5 or 6...maybe even 7 more posts. Any takers? I didn't think so.
But, really...stay tuned. I am working on a new post of better posters (NOT from lots). It will probably take me a while to compile it, but it will happen eventually.
Thanks for visiting.
CHEERS!
Comments
Post a Comment