The Shock-O-Rama Poster Show 2025 #22:

 

Hello, and welcome back. You may want to leave now. What follows is sure to be one of the worst Shock-O-Rama Poster Shows ever. I am not being hyperbolic. It’s bad. How bad is it? If you must know, stick around. But don’t say I didn’t warn you. Proceed at your own risk. Stomach distress bags will not be available. Let’s get this over with…

On Friday, November 7, I looked through the peep hole on my front door. There, on the porch, was a long rectangular box. I wasn’t expecting anything. I quickly pulled it into the house. (I was in my underwear —eeek!—and what little hair hasn’t fallen off my head yet was sprayed out all over the place like a mad scientist.) I looked at the label and saw that it was from my friend Gillian and her husband Jason. Jason works for UPS, which this package had been sent through. Occasionally, Jason will get a package of posters destined for a movie theater that no longer exists. He is supposed to destroy the posters, but he has taken to saving them for me. It had been more than a year since my last package of posters from Jason and Gillian, but of course, I knew exactly what this was. How exciting!

But when I open the package, I was startled to see that the posters inside were far taller than I expected them to be. Oh my stars! They were huge vinyl posters/banners. I did’t own any of those… At least not until today.

AQUAMAN AND THE LOST KINGDOM (48x70 vinyl):

I’m not a superhero, kind of guy, so this Aquaman poster doesn’t really work for me. But I’ve never had a poster this size before. Wow! It’s huge. Sure it’s not as big as a three sheet or some of the Italian 4Fs  or whatever, but it is a big poster. And it’s very cool. How very nice of my friends to send it. Is this a bus shelter poster? I’m not really sure. This size is out of my sphere of knowledge.

AQUAMAN AND THE LOST KINGDOM (48x70 vinyl):

Another Aquaman poster from my friends. Again, it’s not something I would normally ever buy. But it is a nice poster. I don’t know what I’m gonna do with it though.

WONKA (48x70 vinyl):

This one, was actually the first one I unrolled and saw. I love the original WILLY WONKA AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY. There’s something magical about Mr. Wonka…  And that magic has followed me in real life. I’ve had the good fortune of winning pretty decent amounts of money on a WILLY WONKA AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY-themed slot machine over the years. In one instance, 10 years ago, I had paid for plane tickets and my hotel in New Orleans, but I had no money to spend once I was there. Mr. Wonka was gracious enough to smile on me and let me win some money and… Basically paid for my entire trip to New Orleans. There were other instances similar to that in Las Vegas, the most recent being in 2023. I was amazed a Wonka machine was still around to be found. Yet, there one was and Mr. Wonka bestowed a couple of hundred bucks on me.

So when I enrolled this WONKA banner, even though it was for the prequel, I was pleasantly surprised. I had never seen this image before. No, I’ll probably never hang this poster. I do have the original Gene Wilder version that will go up on the wall at some point.… I also have an autographed version of the Johnny Depp WONKA poster, complete with a prop Wonka candy bar, that may also go up. We shall see. But getting this WONKA Poster/banner was a wondrous, magical surprise. Thank you, Gillian and Jason.

DOCTOR STRANGE (11x17):

In my previous post, I mentioned that I somehow found myself bidding on a large number of these freebie 11 x 17 mini posters that are usually given out in theaters for free. I don’t know why I would ever buy these things… But I bought a lot of them. So, I thought I would just post one or one set of each one until I exhaust the supply I’ve purchased. I never saw DR. STRANGE movies and I have no intention of seeing them. I don’t know why I ever bought these poster things. I’m an idiot.

THE PARTY’S OVER (insert):

Oh my stars… I never buy inserts. I’m sure I have maybe a half a dozen or so, but as a rule, I never buy them. I don’t know what I was thinking here. It’s an interesting looking movie, but I’m guessing it sucks since I had never heard of it before. And it’s not even in all that good of condition. Banned by society… But they liked it that way. Ha! What a waste of my cash…

THE DAWN PATROL (video): 

Yeah, I don’t know what I was thinking either…

JOURNEY TO THE CENTER OF THE EARTH (video):

Again, I don’t know what I was thinking. Move along. Move along. There’s nothing to see here.

SANTA CLAUS-THE MOVIE:

This movie is awful, awful, awful. And did I mention that it’s awful? Why would I pick this up? I thought, oh this would be nice to hang up during the holiday season. No. That’s not ever gonna happen. This movie is ho-ho-horrible, but it’s not horror (at least not in the true sense of the word). It will never go up on my walls. Never. Yes, that’s a big Ba humbug from me….but have you seen this crap? Ugh!

HIGH ANXIETY:

I probably already have one of these tucked away somewhere. I didn’t need another one. What was I thinking here? This poster popped up unexpectedly in an auction that was run super fast. I was laying here on my bed, staring at my YOUNG FRANKENSTEIN poster on the wall. I had to make a split second decision. I thought to myself, this flick riffs on a lot of Alfred Hitchcock classics. Why not? So I bid and bid and… It was mine. Oops. I certainly didn’t want it or need it. It will never be hung. Oh well

DOGS OF WAR (aka ROTTWEILER):

This is my “prize“ of the post… And I realize it’s nothing to get excited about. I am excited about it because I’m a dork. I’m a sucker for gimmicks. Back in the early 80s, during the brief 3-D revival, a regional filmmaker named Earl Owensby made a string of 3-D movies. None of them ever played in my town. I’ve never seen any of them. I have collected several of the one sheets for them, though. I have one sheets for his 3D films 3-D TALES OF TERROR, HOT HEIR, and ROTTWEILER. ROTTWEILER, I believe, had the widest distribution of the three. I’ve seen more posters for it than the others. I’ve had to buy several copies of it though as the ones I got always had issues (wear, a snipe, etc).  I knew the film had been released under the name DOGS OF HELL, but I had never seen a poster for it with that title…. Other than a snipe on one of the ROTTWEILER one sheet sheets. Suddenly, this poster popped up. It’s clearly for the same film. It has completely different art, though. It’s interesting that it shows the dogs coming off of a screen, but there is only a brief (and small) mention of it being in 3-D. Despite DOGS OF HELL being so prominently displayed on the poster, the credits clearly say the title is ROTTWEILER. Ha! As lackluster as the poster is, I am delighted to have snagged it. I never even knew it existed.

And that is my 10 for this post. I told you it was gonna be crap. You should’ve left when you could have. Oh well.

Thanks for visiting. I will be back sooner than later with another less than thrilling post. I’ve been buying all kinds of cheap posters lately. I don’t know what I’m thinking. Never mind. Come back or don’t. 

Cheers!